Shattered
by shadowwriter329
Summary: We all know the story; two kids stay with their great uncle for the summer in the sleepy small town of Gravity Falls. What if one of the friends they made wasn't all there? Their mind's a shattered remnant of what it used to be. Now Wendy seems to know a lot more than everyone else, but what does she see? And why does she think she is breaking the 4th wall? "I don't think, I know."


Welcome everyone, and Happy Halloween. Today we are getting many updates and now a new story has been added to the roster. This one is from the teasers and honesty much like the other stories it was way too much fun. Even if I cut some stuff down, the main point is very simple; what happens if one of the main characters (or side character depending on your stance for her) was insane and has been for years. Now, who am I talking about? None other than the coolest female character in gravity falls, Wendy.

Yes, Wendy. At age ten something happened to her and her mind broke. Five years later she is still insane but is right next to Dipper and Mabel in their adventures for the summer. Even more than usual. How will this change everything? Well, only one way to find out. So, sit back and enjoy.

Disclaimer: I don't own Gravity Falls nor the other inspiration of Deadpool because we all know that is who Wendy is acting. Even so, Wendy is pretty much the most badass character and should have had the show about-wait this isn't right. Wendy! Did you change the disclaimer again!?

Shattered

Deep in the forest of Oregon, there was a sleepy town called Gravity Falls. It was a slightly moderate town with their own tv station, food market, a small arcade, a museum, and even a bowling alley. They had a modern school from elementary to high school and even a small community college. But there was also out of the way parts that gave the town its own charm. From the vast forest which included a lumberyard, a large mansion on top of a massive hill, and much more. There were also attractions that tourists go to as they are traveling through. One such place is not in the main town but up one of the side roads and into the woods. It was a decent size log cabin with the large sign on the roof showing it was called the Mystery Shack. The owner, Stanford Pines, had turned his home into a tourist trap where he shows fake exhibits of never before seen beings. Though how anyone was fooled by this or even goes there was a mystery all of itself.

{Blah, blah, blah}

[Tell me about it]

"I hear you guys. I mean; does it really need to be explained?"

Cut to inside the gift shop of the Mystery Shack where a red hair teenager sat behind the register wearing a green flannel shirt and a fur hat. She looked mostly bored with few people in the shop itself before a large [Red] box appeared next to her as if she was in a comic panel. [We know all about this, everyone here knows all about it]

A {Blue} box appear on her other side, adding to the conversation {I mean this gets practically repeated, over and over again when it concerns Gravity Falls and the Mystery Hack}

[Shack]

{Oh right, I can't call it Hack yet until the S gets knocked off}

"Shouldn't be too long now," the girl said with a small grin.

Off to the side a pair of twins around the age of twelve, Dipper and Mabel Pines, were watching the teen, both confused about the girl talking to thin air. "Hey Soos," Mabel asked the handyman of the shack who was working on a new shelf, "who's Wendy talking too?"

Soos looked at them before glancing at Wendy who was chuckling at something. "Oh, she's talking to the voices in her head."

"Voices?" Dipper asked before Mabel added, "in her head?"

Soos nodded, "Yeah Wendy has these two voices only she can hear. She talks to them a lot and they seem to have nice conversations."

[I'm telling you, no one is dumb enough to fall for that]

{It would totally work, and they would love it}

[No one wants to see a stuffed ape with an afro sewed on its head]

"What if it was a white gorilla?" Wendy suggested to them, "And the wig be a rainbow. So, it would stick out more."

{Genius!}

[Still dumb]

{The Mystery Shack}

[…good point]

The twins looked at Soos who shrugged, "At least I think so. I can't hear them, but I mostly talk to Blue."

"Blue?" Dipper asked.

Soos nodded, "Yeah their names are Red and Blue. No idea why but who am I to judge someone's name."

"How do you talk to Blue?" Mabel asked him.

"I mostly talk through Wendy," Soos explained, "They can hear us just fine and Wendy tells me what he says." He turns to Wendy and calls out, "Blue! What's up, dude!?"

{Soos! How's it going, my brother!?}

"He says hi," Wendy said with a small giggle.

{Wow, make it sound I don't miss him}

Soos pouts, "just hi?"

Before Wendy could go further with her joke Mr. Mystery himself walked into the room. Stan was carrying several wooden signs before he looked around, "Look, alive people, I need someone to go hammer some signs in the spooky part of the forest."

"Not it," Dipper and Mabel said at once, before Soos added, "Also not it."

"I didn't ask you, Soos," Stan said to the handyman.

"After a quick council meeting," Wendy said, raising her hands "We decided 'not it' either."

"Like hell, I'm going to let you do it, Wendy," Stan said with a slight glare, "last time I gave you a job like this you came back with nails in your hand."

"Oh, it was just one nail," Wendy complained to him.

{Yeah! We could totally do it this time}

[Actually, it was three nails]

Wendy blinked and looked at Red's speech box, confused, "Really? I could have sworn it was less than that."

"You had a nail in your hand?" Dipper asked, confused even more now.

"Three," Stan corrected, "I had to make her sit down and pulled three nails from her left hand myself."

Dipper himself had a hard time even processing this. All he could ask was, "How?"

"My pain settings are also messed up," Wendy told him with a shrug, "Some days it's normal, some days it's super high and I scream over a papercut and some days I don't feel any pain at all."

"Tell me about it," Stan muttered in an annoyed tone. "If I didn't point it out or made you sit down and let me take 'em out, you would have gone home like that." He shook his head before pointing to Dipper, "you go take care of this."

"What? Why?" Dipper asked his uncle "whenever I go in there I feel like I'm being watched."

"Dude we're all being watched," Wendy said before she glanced to the right and winked at something they are unable to see. "Right everyone?"

The group just stared before Dipper turned back to his uncle. "Look, my mosquito bites are even spelling out 'beware'." Dipper showed the mosquito bites in question.

"That says bewarb." Dipper looked at the claim Stan made, and it was true that it did indeed spell bewarb.

"Don't feel bad dude" Wendy called over, "those little buggers can't spell to save their lives."

{I still say we should teach them to spell right. It's so annoying}

[Do you want to sit down and try and teach mosquitos how to spell?]

{Never mind}

"Look, creepy stories are part of gift shop lore drummed up by guys like me to sell merch to guys like that." Stan pointed to a customer who was having a great time looking at a bobblehead of Stan. "So, quit being so paranoid and get going."

Dipper grumbled but did as he was asked.

(scene change)

A half-hour later Dipper could be found deeper into the forest nailing nails into the trees and hanging signs on them. "Stupid uncle," Dipper muttered to himself annoyed. "Who would even see these signs anyways?"

Dipper placed another nail to a new tree and hit it with the hammer. However, to his surprise, the nail didn't go in and the sound of metal clanging was heard. "Huh?" Dipper muttered before he lowered the nail and tapped the side of the tree twice with the hammer. The tree clanged again and Dipper dropped the hammer. He ran his hand onto the tree and felt it was metal and cold to the touch. He ran his hand to try and figure this out before his hand caught the edge of a door. When he opens it, he found a small compartment that held a large amount of dust and cobwebs. In the center was some sort of control box with several switches. With his curiosity peaked, Dipper flipped one of the switches but nothing happened. He flipped the second one and he heard something opening behind him. He turned to see the ground opened up and revealed a secret door. Dipper walked over and peeked inside to see more dust and cobwebs but also a book. Dipper lifted it out and brushed the dust off. The book held no title but showed a large golden hand with six fingers with the number '3' in the center.

Curious about the book Dipper opens it up and started to read. "It's hard to believe it has been six years since I have begun researching the strange and wonderous secrets of Gravity Falls Oregon." Dipper was excited seeing that he had proof for his uncle and that he wasn't crazy. Dipper flipped through the pages to see details entries and illustrations of different creatures and discoveries. Flipping to a later entry Dipper noticed a change in the writing style as if rushed. "Unfortunately, my suspicions have been confirmed. I am being watched. I must hide this book before he finds it. Remember: in Gravity Falls there is no one you can trust."

Dipper closed the book concern as the last three words were underline: Trust No One! He wondered what has happened to the author and what he meant but his thoughts were interrupted. "Hello!"

Dipper screamed and turned to see his sister looking over the fallen tree he was leaning against to read. "Mabel! Don't do that." Dipper scowled.

"What you got there? Some nerd thing?" Mabel asked not listening.

"Ah, ah, it's nothing!" Dipper quickly said hiding the book behind his back.

"Ah, ah, it's nothing," Mabel mocked with a laugh, "What? Are you actually not going to show me?"

Dipper didn't reply at first before he notice the goat now next to him and now trying to nibble on the book. "Let's go somewhere private."

(scene change)

"It's amazing," Dipper said as he paced in front of Mabel in the living room of the attached home of the Mystery Shack. "Grunkle Stan said I was being paranoid but according to this book, Gravity Falls has this secret dark side."

"Whoa," Mabel said, amazed as well, "shut up!"

"And get this," Dipper went on, "after a certain point the pages just stopped, like the guy who writing it mysteriously disappeared." He was cut from his musing by the ringing of the doorbell. "Who's that?"

"Welp time to spill the beans," Mabel said before she poked an empty can of beans over, with a giggle of her pun "beans. This girl's got a date."

Mabel cheered and fell back onto the chair in her excitement. Dipper, however, had a different reaction "let me get this straight; in the half-hour, I was gone you already found a boyfriend?"

"What can I say" Mabel started "guess I'm just…irresistible!" The doorbell then rang again and Mabel ran off to get it.

Dipper just decided to get back to reading the journal, more interested in the research and how close it is to the truth. He sat down in the lazy-boy, barely noticed his great uncle Stan walking into the room with a can of soda in hand. "What ya reading there slick?"

Dipper was taken by surprise before he hid the journal and grabbed a nearby magazine. Dipper didn't plan on showing his Grunkle anything from the journal any time soon. "Oh I was catching up on," he looked at the magazine he grabbed and was surprised by the title, "Gold Chain for Old Men magazine?"

"That's a good issue" Stan explained taking a sip of his soda.

"Hey Family!" Mabel cried getting their attention. "Say hello to my new boyfriend!"

Mabel reappeared with a boy they never seen before. He had pasty skin, was wearing a black hoodie with what looked like part of a branch sticking out of it, and had a red substance on his cheek.

"S'up?" The boy said with a sort of horse tone voice, giving a small wave.

"Hey," Dipper greet, staring at the boy in surprise.

"How's it hanging?" Grunkle Stan asked, not too bothered by the boy.

"We meet in the cemetery. He's so deep," Mabel explained as she held her boyfriend's arm, finding it surprising the small amount of muscles he had. "Little muscle there…what a surprise.

"So what's your name?" Dipper asked, suspicious of the teen.

"Um, normal...man!" the teen said, looking slightly started and nervous.

"He means Norman." Mabel corrected.

Dipper, however, looked at the slightly dripping red stain on his cheek. "Are you bleeding Norman?"

Norman glanced at the dripping spot before he said, "It's jam."

Mabel gasped, "I love jam! Look at this!"

"So you wanna go hold hands or whatever?" Norman asked in the same tone as when he first talked.

"Oh my goodness," Mabel said, waving her hand in her face to calm herself. "Don't wait up!" Mabel declared before she ran off with Norman to follow behind her. Norman gave them a clicking gun sign before he slammed into the wall before following after Mabel.

Dipper narrowed his eyes as they left, a bad feeling starting to creep in.

(scene change)

Dipper decided to head to the antic where he read for the journal for answers about Norman. He sounds found an entry that may have been an answer. "Known for their pasty skin and bad attitudes, these creatures are often confused for…teenagers! Beware of Gravity Falls nefarious undead!" Dipper saw the picture was an exact, or at least near-exact copy, of Norman. Even as he looked at the picture he imagined Norman replacing the image saying 'S'up'. This causes Dipper to scream out in panic. "Zombie!"

Dipper panicked and looked outside to see Norman shambling closer towards Mabel, who was sitting coyly on the bench. Dipper screamed, ready to try and want Mabel but it was unneeded as Norman backed away after grabbing her to show he just gave the girl a necklace of daisies. Dipper breathed a sigh of relief before he started to focus again. He stepped away from the window to think. "Is my sister really dating a zombie? Or am I going nuts?"

"It's a dilemma to be sure."

Dipper jumped only to see Soos replacing a lightbulb. The handyman looked at Dipper "though Wendy is the one you want to talk to if you think you're going nuts."

"Soos, you've seen Mabel's boyfriend; he's got to be a zombie, right?"

Soos hummed and tabbed his chin before he asked, "How many brains did you see the guy eat?"

Dipper slumped his shoulders, "Zero."

Soos stepped off his step ladder and said, "look, dude, I believe you. I'm always noticing some weird stuff in this town. Like the mailman; pretty sure that dude's a werewolf."

(flashback)

Soos was sitting on a bench in the park eating his lunch when the mailman walked on by. He was a large built man with a massive beard and mustache as well as hair peeking from his sleeves and collar. Soos narrowed his eyes before he scooched over on the bench before dragging his paper bagged lunch with him. Wendy suddenly peeked out from behind the bench, surprising Soos before stating, "You know he was just bitten by a gnome, right?"

(flashback ends)

Soos jumped before he looked behind him to see Wendy right behind him. The handyman couldn't help but wonder if Wendy was really in his flashback or not. Wendy didn't seem to notice however as she asked, "So what you two doing?"

"Wendy, you've seen Norman right?" Dipper asked her, "Dude got's to be a zombie."

Wendy, however, laughs "A zombie? There's no way that's dudes a zombie?"

"Huh?" Dipper asked, taken aback by the answer.

"Guys too smart," Wendy went on, "he talks too much for a zombie and even then he never went for Mabel's brain when he got plenty of chances."

{I wonder what her brain would be like}

[If you remove it, her brain will most likely be spilling out glitter or rainbows]

{A reading rainbow?}

[Sure, let's go with that]

Soos helped Dipper make more sense of it all, "either way dude you gotta have evidence. Otherwise, people will be thinking you're a major coo-coo clock."

"Ahh Soos," Wendy said, a hand on her chest, "that's so nice."

Dipper wasn't sure what to say to that before he nodded, "as always Soos, you're right."

"My wisdom is both a blessing and a curse" Soos explained with a knowing look on his face.

{So true Soos, so true}

[We too insane to have any wisdom]

Wendy rolled her eyes "being sane is too boring now." She turned and walked out of the room before waving over her shoulder, "Well I'm bored. I think I'll go chase the question quails around on the golf cart. See you guys in a few paragraphs."

Soos just waved goodbye while Dipper was trying to figure out what she meant by that. In the hallway, Wendy glanced to the left and smiled at apparently nothing. "Okay _now_ consider your fourth wall broken."

[Why are we leaving out of sight from everyone here?]

{Yeah, we upgraded our stasis to main character now}

"Because we're too awesome to hog all the screen time" Wendy explained as if it was so simple. "The others need to have their share."

[…]

{…}

[…fair point]

"I know" Wendy gloats slightly before she declares almost randomly "End of scene and fade to black."

(scene change)

The next day Mabel was getting ready for a new date with Norman. Unbeknownst to her, Dipper had followed them and spying in order to gather evidence to see if Norman was a zombie or not. He watched as Norman was always stiff and slow to react to things; such as when he was hit in the head with a Frisbee Mabel threw and he just fell forward a few seconds later. He was also unsteady as he moves such as a few times he walks and even does crazy things like break through a window to open the door from the other side to allow Mabel to get into a diner. However, it was seeing Norman fall into a grave and pop out again did Dipper seem to be convinced.

Dipper walked in to finally talked to her, "Mabel, we got to talk about Norman."

Mabel asked, "isn't he the best? Check out this giant smooch mark he gave me."

Mabel turned her head to show a large pink circle mark on her cheek. Dipper jumped, a small gasp escaping from his lips. Mabel, however, laughed, "gullible. It's was an accident with the leaf blower."

(flashback)

"Kissing practice!" Mabel cried as she turns the leaf blower on to suck and place a large photo with the mouth cut out over the hole where it stuck. Mabel leaned over to kiss the 'mouth' but the leaf blower however sucked the photo inside the machine, leaving Mabel expose to also get sucked into the machine tube. She struggled and smacked the leaf blower as her mouth was covered to prevent her from calling for help.

(Flashback ends)

"That was fun," Mabel mused at the memory.

"No Mabel listen," Dipper said to get her to focus. "I'm trying to tell you that Norman is not what he seems."

Dipper pulled out the journal and Mabel gasped, "you think he's a vampire." Mabel then gave a small squeal, "that would be so awesome."

"Guess again sister," Dipper said before he opens the book and showed her the page "Sha-bam!"

Mabel cried out, a tongue sticking out. However, it was on the page for gnomes instead of what Dipper intended. But Dipper quickly realized he was on the wrong page. "Oh I'm sorry," he flipped to the correct page, "Sha-bam!"

"A zombie?" Mabel asked not amused, "That's not funny Dipper."

"I'm not joking," Dipper explained putting away the journal. "It all adds up. The bleeding, the limp. He never blinks! Have you ever noticed that?"

"Maybe he's blinking when you're blinking?" Mabel suggested.

"Mabel remember what the book said about Gravity Falls?" Dipper asked. "Trust no one."

"What about me huh? Why can't you trust me?" Mabel asked seriously, though any seriousness was ruined when she added large star earnings with a small "beep-bop."

"Mabel!" Dipper said grabbing his twin's shoulders and shook her, "he's going to eat your brains!"

However, Mabel had enough, "Dipper listen to me. Norman and I are going on a date at five o clock, and I'm going to be adorable," here she pokes Dipper in the chest forcefully causing him to step back, "And he's going to be dreamy," Another poke this time causing him to get out of the room. "and I'm not going to let you ruin it with one of your crazy conspiracies!" and with this she slammed the door, ending the conversation.

Dipper just sighed and sat down against the door, "What am I going to do?"

Mabel was running down the stairs to answer it and there stood Norman once more. "Hey Norman," Mabel greeted before she pulled at her sweater, "how do I look?"

Her sweater was bright purple with a lot of glitter with a cat's face in the middle with the words "Meow Wow" encircling it. Norman looked at her sweater before he declared in his normal tone "Shiny."

Mabel giggled and held his hand, "Oh Norman, you know just what to say."

Dipper watched them go walk off before the boy sighed. He walked into the living room and sat on the chair, looking at the camera he used to record his findings. As he replayed the tape he sighed "Maybe Soos's right, I don't have any real evidence. I guess I was just paranoid...Wait What!?"

It was then that Dipper noticed something in one part of the video: Norman's hand fell off and he reattached it. Dipper had to jump up as he had proof! "Ah-ha! He is a zombie!" he then realized what this meant. "Oh no, Mabel!"

Dipper ran out of the house, calling for his uncle for help. Stan himself was in the middle of the tour, taking the group outside to the front of the gift shop. He presented his newest attraction. "And here we have 'rock that looks like a face' rock. The rock that looks like a face." Stan said to them, showing the rock with the disturbing or derpy looking face carved into it. this spawned many questions from the tourist, wanting to know whether it is a face or a rock.

"Grunkle Stan! Grunkle Stan!" Dipper tried to call over the tourist group, but the elder man didn't seem to hear him.

In fact, he was getting even annoyed by the tourist. "For the fifth time, it's not an actual face!"

Seeing this was going no way Dipper would get his uncle's attention, he saw that Wendy was driving up in the Mystery Shack golf cart. "Wendy!" Dipper called up, running up to her as she got out, "I need to borrow the golf cart so I can save my sister from a zombie!"

Wendy looked at him for a moment before she dropped the keys into his hands, "your drive, I'll shoot."

Dipper was taken aback at this, "Wait, shoot? Shoot what?"

Wendy blinked before she smacked the side of her head to get herself to focus, "sorry I was thinking of James Bond for a second there."

{If you are going to be an ass-kicking spy then pick a recent badass}

[Yeah, like Archer]

Wendy glared at Red "on no; I'm already messed up in the head I don't need his issues on top of it."

Dipper would and asked what she was talking about, but his sister came first. He got into the golf cart while Wendy jumped into the back. Once onboard, Dipper took off as fast as he could to save Mabel. As they drove into the forest Wendy's voice could be heard all the way back at the shack, "Run Shadowfax; show us the meaning of haste!"

(scene change)

"Finally, we're alone," Mabel said after a short walk with Norman. The pair had walked deeper and deeper into the woods, both just enjoying each other's company.

"Yes, alone," Norman said glancing at her before looking ahead again.

After they stopped in a clearing Norman spoke, in a serious yet nervous pitch added to his tone. "Look, Mabel, now that we've known each other, there's something I gotta tell you."

"You can tell me anything Norman" Mabel did say to confined in him. Mentally however she had a different thought process. _'Please be a vampire! Please be a vampire!'_

Norman had a hand in the zipper of his hoody "Okay, just don't freak out. Keep an open mind."

As Norman unzipped the hoody, Mabel's eyes went wide before the teen pulled the clothes off of him. But then Mabel saw the truth…he was a bunch of Gnomes stacked on top of each other with fake arms and hands. "Is this weird? Is this too weird? Do you need to sit down?" the top gnome that was Norman's head asked him in a more normal voice.

All Mabel could do was gap at them, unable to comprehend what she is seeing.

"Right, I'll explain," the top gnome stated before clapping his hands. "So, we're Gnomes. First off, get that out of the way." The gnome started some introductions "Anyway, I'm Jeff, and this Carson, Steve, Jason, and…" Jeff paused before he admitted, "I'm sorry, I always forget your name."

"Schmebulok" the last gnome informed him.

Jeff snapped his fingers "Schmebulok, yes. Anyway, long story short, us Gnomes have been looking for a new Gnome queen. Right guys?" The other Gnomes chanted queen for a bit while making grabby hands.

"So, what do you say?" Jeff asked as he tapped the head of one of the gnomes. One gnome 'leg' bent as if taking a knee while the other 'arm' pulled a ring case out. "Will you join us in holy matrignomy, matri-matrimony? Blargh, I can't talk today." The box opens to show a crystal ring, not an expensive crystal, like an adamant stone like a diamond or rubies, but a simple crystal that anyone could've picked up in the forest.

Mabel winced and tried to let them down gently "look, I'm sorry guys. You're really sweet, but I'm a girl, and you're Gnomes and it's like 'what?'. Yikes."

The gnomes looked at one another before they slumped down, "We understand. We'll never forget you, Mabel." Jeff said getting Mabel to smile at the fact that Jeff was taking it so well, but then it fell when he added, "Because we're going to kidnap you."

"Huh?" was all Mabel could say before the gnomes all jumped at her, causing the girl to scream.

(scene change)

Dipper was driving in the golf cart around the forest, Wendy not making a sound as they drove. He then heard Mabel's scream and could guess which direction it was coming from.

He drove through the woods and down a hill, following the sounds until he entered a thicket with several thick trees behind them. He saw Mabel surrounded by a bunch of small men in red pointy hats as they tried to tie her down. Jeff was standing on a rock to overlook everything. "the more you struggle the more awkward this will be for everybody." He called out over Mabel before he pinched the bridge of his nose "Okay, just hold her arm, Steve."

Dipper watched stunned as one man was biting onto Mabel's sweater as she shook him off and she punched it knocking the gnome into the wall. The gnome was able to get up but then bent over and started to vomit a rainbow. "What the heck is going on here!?" Dipper cried out hoping to get an explanation.

"Dipper!" Mabel called out, able to sit up for a second before the gnomes tried to pounce on her "Norman turned out to be a bunch of gnomes! And their total jerks!" Mabel jerked as her hair was pulled backward "Hair! Hair! Hair!"

"Gnomes?" Dipper said getting the journal out, "I was way off." He opens to the right page and started to read. "Gnomes: Little men of Gravity Falls forests. Weakness…unknown."

He was about to ask Wendy if she knew anything about them when he looked up to see Mabel was caught and tied to the ground much to her annoyance. He stepped forward and confronted them, "Hey! Let go of my sister!"

Jeff nearly "Oh hey there," he chuckled nervously "This is all just a big misunderstanding. You see your sister is not in danger. She's just going to marry all one-thousand of us and become our gnome queen for all eternality." He turned to Mabel, "Isn't that right honey?"

"You guys are all butt-faces!" Mabel called out before another gnome covered her mouth with her hand.

"Give her back or else," Dipper warned, pointing a shovel as one of the items Wendy had in the cart before they even left the shack. When asked why she did that all Dipper got as a response was 'to get our violence on when we go rescue Mabel.'

Jeff narrowed his eyes at him. "You think you can stop us alone boy? You don't know what we are capable of. The Gnomes are a powerful race. Do not…Hey! Look at something when they are talking to you boy!"

It was halfway through Jeff's speech did Dipper figure out that Wendy had yet to appear or even say anything since they got here. He turned to the cart, not even listening to the gnome at this point before he shouts, "Wendy!"

Wendy jerked and shot up, showing she was hidden in the back of the cart. "I'm up! I'm up!"

Dipper stared in amazement, "you fell asleep!"

"Seriously?" Mabel asked, slightly annoyed at this.

"Sorry it was boring heading over here," Wendy said before she jumped from the cart and landed next to Dipper with an ax in hand. "Alright, where is Normeny? I'm ready to get my violence on!" she then noticed the gnomes, who were looking at her fearfully. "Wait gnomes? Ah man. That's no fun."

"It's the crazy one!" one gnome shouted, shakily pointing at Wendy.

Even Jeff looked nervous, "say now, let's talk about this for a second. No reason to go crazy here."

"Too late," Wendy said, tossing her ax away before pulling a golf club from behind her back. "Fore!"

All Jeff had time for was to scream as he was smack by the club and sent flying into one of the trees. The gnomes all panicked and tried to run away but Wendy was on them and sent several more flying with the next swing. Dipper took this moment to run forward and snap the cords holding Mabel down with the shovel. Once free Mabel got up and ran with Dipper to the golf cart, but not before calling out to their friend, "C'mon Wendy!"

Wendy knocked another group of gnomes away before she jumped back into the cart. Once everyone was inside they reversed out before driving away. "He's getting away with our queen!" Jeff cried getting back up, "No! No! No!"

But it was too late and Jeff was really angry now. "You messed with the wrong creatures, boy. We'll get our queen back."

"But the crazy one!" One gnome pointed out.

Jeff, however, was not deterred. "We have one last trick even she can't handle. Gnomes of the forest…. assemble!"

Out of the tree, the roots and other hiding places more and more gnomes came by the hundreds. They all gathered around and started to come together and form something.

The cart speed through the forest, on the way towards the Mystery Shack. Mabel was still worried as she glanced back to see if any gnomes were following them. "Hurry before they come after us," she tried to tell her brother.

"I wouldn't worry about it," Dipper said calmly "You see their little legs? Those suckers are tiny. Plus, they are terrified of Wendy."

[Should we tell him?]

"He'll figure it out," Wendy said simply.

And right on queue, the ground shook which caused Dipper to stop the cart. Now they heard the sound of stomping and a great big shadow appeared over them. they turned to see the gnomes all amassed together to form a giant evil gnome. The twins stared back in horror while Wendy just stared at the gnome monster as if trying to figure it out.

{Am I the only one that thinks it looked like an evil Santa Claus?}

[Nope]

{Oh good, it's not just me then}

"Is part of it even need though?" Wendy asked the two voices in her head. "I mean I get the hat, beard, and even the mouth. But why are there several gnomes acting as the tongue? It doesn't even talk, it barely can even roar."

"Okay teamwork guys!" Jeff said at the very top of the gnometron, moving two hats as if controllers. "like we practiced."

The Gnometron roar before raising a hand to slam down onto the trio. Dipper shifted the cart into gear and drove off as fast as he can. The fist hit the floor and fell apart into separate gnomes before the came back together to form the arm again and started to give chase to them. As it got nearing the Gnometron grabbed several gnomes from its body and threw them at the cart. The landed on the top and started to bite and ripe the roof apart. Wendy grabbed the end and flipped herself over before turning and kicking the gnomes away.

More gnomes landed but Wendy was punching and knocking them away while the voices added their own effects.

[Bam!]

{Pow!}

[Crack!]

{Boom!}

[Slam!]

{Ow!}

Wendy chuckled to herself at this, "gotta love the classics."

A few gnomes landed below Wendy and tried to attack the kids. Mabel slammed her elbow into one and knocked it off. The gnome known as Schmebulok landed behind Dipper and tried to grab him. But Dipper caught the gnome without even looking at him and smacked the creature to the front of the steering wheel. The gnome moaned a "Schmebulok" in pain before Dipper threw him off the cart. One gnome landed in front of them on the hood and dove at Dipper, catching by surprise and started to scratch his face.

"I'll save you Dipper!" Mabel called out before she punched the gnome, which also to get hit as well before one final hit knocked the gnome free and it fell to the side of the road, with Dipper's brown hat cramped in its teeth.

"Thanks, Mabel," Dipper muttered, a bit dizzy before he shook himself to clear his head.

The Gnometron had enough and grabbed a tree and ripped it from the earth. With the new weapon, the monster threw the whole tree at them, sailing over and crashing in front of them, forcing Dipper to swerve to avoid it. the cart tipped over and slid out of the woods before stopping right next to the Mystery Shack.

Dipper and Mabel got up, both okay if not a little dirty. Wendy, however, shot up with a laugh, "woo! Let's do that again!"

Neither was able to answer her, as a shadow cover them all and they looked to see the Gnometron towering over them. "Stay back!" Dipper ordered as he threw a nearby shovel at the gnomes. However, the Gnometron caught the shovel and crushed it into the ground. The twins backed away before Dipper asked, "where's Grunkle Stan?"

Inside the shack the man in question was finishing up a tour, nobody of the group even glancing outside the window where they could have easily seen. Stan held a device that looked like a fake lollipop with a black and white swirl pattern and showed the tour. "Behold the world's most distracting object! Just try to look away." He pulled the string and the device swirled around, mesmerizing the group, even Stan lost focus as he said, "I can't remember what I was talking about."

Outside the kids were back up against the wall of the shack, "end of the line kids," Jeff called down from the very top of the Gnometron. "Mabel! Merry us before we do something crazy."

"You don't know the meaning of crazy!" Wendy countered, getting her golf club and ax out and pointing the club at the Gnometron. "Come on guys, we can take 'em."

"Wendy!" Dipper shouts to her, "That thing is twenty feet tall!"

Wendy shrugged "Big deal, they're just little bugs trying to look big."

"Don't call us bugs!" Jeff cries out, forcing the Gnometron to stomp its foot. "We can squish you now!"

"Try it!" Wendy dared him, "you can't even reach my knees you overrated, throw away lawn decoration!"

"I can too!"

"Your hat doesn't count!"

Dipper knew he couldn't let Wendy keep aggravating the gnomes but didn't know what to do against them. "There's got to be a way out of this" Dipper said reaching for the journal inside his vest.

Mabel, however, stopped him and said, "I got to do it."

Dipper gasped in disbelief, "Mabel, don't do this. Are you crazy?"

"Trust me," Mabel told him.

"What?"

"Dipper for one please, just trust me."

Dipper looks to his sister to the Gnometron waiting for them. Wendy glanced at him before she shrugged and said, "just do it, dude. If it doesn't work then I get to see if I can rip this monster apart, gnome by gnome." She paused and pouts, "though since they are just holding each other it might not be as fun."

Glancing at his sister once more Dipper finally took a step aside to show he was leaving it to her. Mabel smiled before she turned to the Gnometron. "Alright Jeff," Mabel said taking a step forward, "I'll marry you."

"Hot dog!" Jeff declared, making the Gnometron stomp a foot and pumped a fist as he cheered. Slowly he started to climb down the Gnometron, leaving it immobile now that no one was 'driving' it. Once on the ground, he walked over, glancing and keeping distance from Wendy, before he presented the ring with the crystal stone from before. Mabel allowed him to slip it on her ring finger. "Bada-bing, bada-bam!" Jeff cheered at his victory, "Now let's get you back into the forest honey."

Jeff took a step before Mabel said something that stopped him in his tracks. "You may now kiss the bride."

Jeff blinked before he grinned. "Well, don't mind if I do." Jeff then turned and puckered his lips for the kiss he was promised.

Dipper was nervous when Mabel at first leaned down to give the kiss before he reached behind her and pulled out the leaf blower which she turned on threatening to suck a surprised Jeff. "That's for lying to me!" Mabel then pulled the blower more, swallowing Jeff's feet as she spoke. "That's for breaking my heart!" She really didn't like the fact that Jeff and his Gnomes were trying to force her into a marriage.

Wendy leaned on the golf club, watching the whole thing amused.

[That doesn't look pleasant]

{Look at him getting nearly sucked in from the face}

"Couldn't happen to a nice guy" Wendy added with a chuckle.

Mabel then took aim at the Gnometron with the leaf blower, "And this is for messing with my brother!"

The Gnometron gasped surprised at the fact she was all but aiming a weapon at it. Mabel then smirked to her brother, "Wanna do the honors?"

"On three: 1, 2, 3!" The twins finished at the same time and shot Jeff at the Gnometron. The beast burst apart into the thousands of gnomes while Jeff was sent sailing off beyond their sight of the forest.

The gnomes fell to the forest floor, most were complaining about how they needed orders or how they were tired from the Gnometron. But it all stopped when they noticed Wendy was standing over them with a smile that actually scared them very much. With the golf club resting over her shoulder all she said was, "boo."

This caused them to scamper off in terror while Wendy laughed at this reaction. Even more when one got caught in a soda pack ring and was taken by the goat that lived on the property. She saw the twins were heading back to the shack, no doubt to eat dinner and rest for the day. "I like 'em," Wendy told her voices which agreed with her.

{They do seem like fun}

[This summer will be a lot crazier with those two here]

{And we care because?}

"Yeah Red, that sounds awesome."

[I didn't say it wasn't, I was just pointing it out]

I can't wait for what fun they would bring," Wendy said as she started to walk off towards home.

{Yep}

[Same]

"And next time we see them Dipper will be wearing his blue hat."

{Oh, thank god. It was so weird seeing him in a brown hat}

[Tell me about it. At least it was only for today]

Wendy nodded, "yeah but all is right with the story now."

{…you think Mabel will make one of those sweaters for me?}

[She can't make us sweaters. We're voices in her head]

{Awww}

Wendy just laughed at Blue disappointment but decided not to tell them that she was sure Mabel would love to make the sweater even if the two couldn't wear them. "So what are we gonna do now?"

[Actually, I think the chapter's over]

* * *

Wendy blinked before she looked up to see the solid line cutting through the page. "Aw man, I'm part of the ending notes now? Oh come on man, no one ever reads those."

SW: Sorry not sorry

Wendy: Wait why is the format changing?

SW: Well the chapter has ended officially so there is no reason to keep the normal format

Wendy: AKA, you're being lazy

SW: Details. So since you are clearly the best pick, how about give the closing remarks?

Wendy: I hear the sarcasm but I am blinded by the blatant flattery so I think I will. Give me the card.

Wendy: So the chapter is over and I know I was awesome. (SW: read it right) Whatever. Red and Blue had fun and let's admit it the chapter was fun all around. We showed some more cannon scenes to show that it's the whole cast and not just about Wendy though if you think it can be cut back let us know and we can work it out better for the next one. (throws card away) Personally, that's just an excuse to be lazy and not worry about getting as many details right.

SW: hey

Wendy: it's true and you know it.

SW: well two can play that game. So leave a review telling us what you guys like, what issues did you have and if you want to ask questions to Wendy feel free. In fact, next chapter Wendy will be replying to two or three of the best reviews or questions. Maybe more but can't do too many.

Wendy: Wait…what!? I never agreed to that!

SW: Too bad, it's done.

Wendy: You just decided that at the last minute!

SW: That may be but it's still gonna happen. *logs off*

Wendy: Shadow! Shadow don't make me come out of this computer screen and kick your ass! Shadow! I know that big secret of yours on this site and I am not afraid to blackmail with it! *sigh* Happy Halloween everyone, I got to go and see if I can beat someone in the real world. Goodnight.


End file.
